I have been ready to be done nursing for a while now, and we finally did it. I've been unsuccessfully half-trying for several weeks, but the circumstances were just right the past few days and we made it through the night last night without nursing at all. About a week ago I stopped nursing before I put Beckett to bed, so then I was only nursing once in the middle of the night. Now that we skipped last night, I'm 99% certain my supply is gone. I know the next few nights will probably be a little hard for both of us, but knowing that nursing isn't even an option makes it easier. The original plan was for Mark to trying getting up with him this weekend. But when he woke last night at 4:30 am I felt very rested and decided it was time. I gave Beckett a drink from his sippy cup and was surprised to find that he didn't argue and was content to just cuddle for a little bit. He did have a hard time falling back asleep, there were some tears, and it took about an hour, but he eventually fell asleep in my arms without nursing at all.
I held my sleeping boy a little bit longer than normal last night. As I realized that the night before was the last time I would ever nurse him, a few tears ran down my cheeks while I held him in the dark. Not because I'm sad to be done, but because it symbolizes how much he has grown and changed from the little swaddled baby that I used to hold and snuggle late at night. Now his feet dangle off to the side because he doesn't fit in my arms like he used to. Beckett is turning into a beautiful little boy and although a little part of me is sad at how fast it's all happening, my heart is filled with joy and happiness as I watch him change, learn, and grow into such a fun and wonderful little guy.
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